


A Whisper In The Corner Of My Lovesick Thoughts

by wewriteanyshit



Category: Wolfblood (TV)
Genre: Canon Compliant, F/F, First Date, First Kiss, Fluff, Internalized Homophobia, Love Confessions, but i guess it's there if you squint a bit, how do you tag??, i think, it's been a while since i watched series 5, my writing is at it's best during the long rambles which are irrelevant to the storyline, not really - Freeform, teenage love, they're gay!!!
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-16
Updated: 2019-04-16
Packaged: 2020-01-15 03:25:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,477
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18490351
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wewriteanyshit/pseuds/wewriteanyshit
Summary: The word "friend" feels weird on Selina's tongue, should she ever use it to describe Hannah. The word "frenemy", on the other hand, could never be used more appropriately, she had once thought, than to describe the relationship between the two of them. Funny then, how what Selina has recently been experiencing is a feeling which was quite different to either of those - and it's foolish, but possible, her heart begs, that Hannah feels something similar.





	A Whisper In The Corner Of My Lovesick Thoughts

**Author's Note:**

> This fic is less of a crack fic than the last one we posted!
> 
> I'm a major wolfblood fan (if such a thing exists) and I loved the relationship between Hannah and Selina in series 5! Hannah is pretty obviously gay for Selina imo, so #halinaforlife
> 
> The tense is also all over the place in this one, I shouldn't be allowed to attempt writing in the present tense tbh
> 
> And the title is a line from Ease My Mind by Queen Hayley Kiyoko ayyyy
> 
> Hope you enjoy! - MJ

aain"Are you two on a date, then?"

"It's not a date."

Hannah wrinkles her nose in disgust at Katrina's suggestion, as if the sheer thought is abhorrent to her. The cheery blonde waitress isn't put off by this, winking at the pair of them as she sets Selina's strawberry milkshake and Hannah's americano down on the table.

"Am I that off-putting to you?" Selina asks, rolling her eyes as she takes a sip of her milkshake through the straw.

"I'm not gay - and if I was, I could certainly do better than _you_ ," Hannah shoots back. "What, would you want to date me?"

"I think I'd rather die," Selina replies with a grin, and this makes Hannah crack a smile.

"Same, Wolfie." She slurps her coffee, and subtly looks at the counter out of the corner of her eye before leaning in to whisper to Selina. "Look, Katrina's stealing glances like she thinks we're gonna start making out any second."

She's right - and Selina snorts with laughter, and the two of them collapse into giggles together.

If you asked Selina, say, six months ago, whether or not she'd ever go to grab drinks with Hannah after a sparring session, she'd have blurted put "no" straight away, and laughed in your face. But that was surely changing, along with sparring itself - now they joke and chat when they take breaks to drink water, help each other up; one time when Selina succeeded in kicking Hannah to the floor, Hannah swapped her scowl for a smile and said "Not bad, Wolfie."

The nickname used to be patronising and teasing, spat Selina's way when she tentatively approached Hannah at the start of the school day. Now it's used in an endearing fashion, one of those little things that hints at a friendship without explicitly spelling it out, along with the way Hannah started laughing at Selina's jokes begrudgingly and suggesting they get drinks after they finish practicing - which has brought them here, to the Kafé, sipping their drinks under Katrina's curious stares, whilst Selina watches the twinkling fairy lights strung around the café and Hannah gazes out of the window at passers-by, neither of them sure what to say to each other. It's different to when they're practicing taekwondo, or chatting in the corridors in school, where conversation seems to come naturally - or they can just talk about nothing at all. But the closeness that has bubbled up seems to falter now, on a deliberate outing to spend time together which definitely _isn't_ a date.

Of course, offers of friendship can be much more explicit, like what Hannah muttered to Selina under her breath when they were preparing to leave Maths class one day.

"If anyone," she began quietly, looking around to check that none of her "cool" friends are witnessing this conversation, "gives you crap for being a wolfblood, you can let me know and I'll sort them out for you."

"Thanks," Selina had said awkwardly, pulling her bag onto her shoulder. "But I think I can do a pretty good job of looking after myself."

"I don't doubt you," Hannah replied, with the glimmer of a smile on her lips, but there is something much more serious in her eyes. "I just wanted to let you know... I've got your back."

 _I've got your back_ \- and indeed, it would seem that Hannah is true to her word. If any of their classmates go off on an anti-wolfblood rant, Hannah is primed and ready with a sharp comeback, often along the lines of "Oi, shut up, you're just mad cause you've got a face that looks like it belongs in the zoo." And every time Hannah does this, it _matters_ to Selina, feeling like a warm hug with the power to keep you safe and protected. Not feelings she used to associate with the girl who once hurt her, but everything has changed since her number one secret was revealed to the world.

The word "friend" feels weird on Selina's tongue, should she ever use it to describe Hannah. The word "frenemy", on the other hand, could never be used more appropriately, she had once thought, than to describe the relationship between the two of them. Funny then, how what Selina has recently been experiencing is a feeling which was quite different to either of those - and it's foolish, but possible, her heart begs, that Hannah feels something similar.

Selina won't deny, can't deny, that she likes to study Hannah's face. She notes that her profile is gorgeous as she looks at the street outside, resting her chin on her hand. She loves her bright, intense blue eyes, the dark hair that frames her face, the dark stare that often settles on it and has the power to send boys in their school running, and the way it all lights up with joy when she laughs. Nowadays, Hannah laughs more often, and often because of Selina - and she laughs _with_ her, and rarely _at_ her anymore. And Selina hasn't missed the delicate blush that dusts Hannah's cheeks pink in those moments. It could mean nothing at all, or absolutely everything.

"Um... So..."

Hannah's finished her coffee in what must be record time, and has her eyes fixed so sternly on Selina's that Selina can almost feel herself blushing.

"Do you want to get another drink?" Selina asks casually, and Hannah shakes her head.

"Nah. I was thinking we could just... Go for a walk, or something?" Hannah says this in a weird voice, and Selina raises an eyebrow. Yes, the whole fact that they're sitting here together is weird, but not as weird as the way Selina's heart is beating.

"Sounds good to me."

Katrina waves a hand sporting rings and bright pink acrylic nails in their direction, and Selina smiles at her as they leave, the bell on the door tinkling behind them.

***

Out in the open air, chatting seems to come easier, as Hannah rambles on about their English teacher, who gives them essay after essay and fails to mark any of them. It's a common theme between the two of them - discovering that you hate the exact same members of staff does wonders for a high school connection. Selina and Hannah walk until they reach a bridge, and they lean their arms on the edge, watching the cold grey water. It's the same place they stood ages ago when they first formed what was more akin to an alliance back then, smiling together, and Selina feels a smile settle on her face now at how in some ways it's similar. Hannah is awkward in a H&M jacket, and Selina wears a glittering hijab and can't fight off the stars in her eyes, not that she'd want to.

The fact that Hannah was a girl wasn't something Selina that had ever really crossed her mind - it was fairly common for wolfbloods to fall in love with any person, regardless of gender. Hannah was more exciting, funny, beautiful to her than any boy she'd met for a long, long time. And better to be around than TJ, who had complicated everything by declaring his love and then retracting it, confusing Selina and making her wish she could just get a break. His one true love was himself, after all.

And even though Selina hates herself for daring to think it, because the logical side of her brain keeps saying it can't be true, her gut is telling her that Hannah shared something of her feelings. She thinks she sees it in the way Hannah's eyes linger on her from time to time; the fact that Hannah would probably try to fight anyone else who tried to touch her, but will cling to Selina's arm or rest her head on her shoulder like it's nothing; the awkward pauses and shy smiles when a brushing of hands lasts too long  or their faces come close together. Selina doesn't want to admit that this all might just be a foolish whisper in the corner of her lovesick thoughts. That after TJ has disappointed her time and time again, maybe she's just yearning for something better. Richer. Shared by another girl in love. A bright, young romance that could fill her days with light. And she doubts the day will ever come when she could possibly imply this to Hannah or push things further, lest she make a mistake, like touching a shiny gossamer bubble and watching it pop before your eyes.

"Isn't it weird," Hannah begins to say, in the firm tone of voice that Selina has come to adore, whether it was yelling "Kick harder!" or whispering "Thank you for helping me with that homework, Wolfie", "That a couple of months ago we hated each other, and now I know pretty much everything about you?"

Selina grins and nods, watching Hannah's ponytail as it's blown about by the wind. "And I know everything about you, more or less."

"Not everything," Hannah says in a deliberately mysterious way, and the two of them laugh, although Hannah's is much quieter.

"There's one thing we haven't talked about," she says suddenly, tossing her head so her hoop earrings sparkle and make little clinking noises.

"Oh, what's that?"

"Boys," Hannah replies with a mischievous grin, which fades into a frown. "Not that I've had much luck with that."

"Trust me, neither have I," Selina says distractedly, watching rubbish swirling in the water. TJ Cipriani is not a topic she likes to dwell on, and Hannah knows this. "You're the expert here. You've been out with plenty more boys than I have."

"But none of them were right, were they?" Hannah replies, impassioned, glaring at the swirling river like she wants to spar with it. She looks angry, annoyed, but somehow at peace, like everything she's saying makes sense for the first time. "None of them wanted to stay, and, like, I acted like I was sad about it or whatever... But I wasn't. I never really wanted them to stay either." She presses her glossy lips together when she says this, like she's punctuating her sentence. Her eyebrows are furrowed, but she has the general air of someone who's made a decision.

Selina lets out a noncommittal hmm after Hannah says this, not sure what sort of response is warrented.

"So I've been thinking," Hannah adds on quickly, seemingly desperate to get it out , "That I might just give up on boys altogether."

Glancing upwards, making eye contact with her friend, Selina says, "Good idea. I think I might do the same thing."

"Selina, I want to tell you something."

For a moment, the only significant noise is the rushing of water. The chatter of people walking past, the murmur of cars, the cawing of far-off birds - Selina can tune all of that out. The look on Hannah's face is unlike anything else.

"For a while," Hannah mumbles, barely audible over the sound of the city, "I've been having these... feelings, and I didn't know what they were. Or maybe I did know, but I was denying it. I wasn't expecting any of it, but I've realised something that I'm afraid of. And I can't tell anybody this. Not my mum and dad, not any of my friends and school... I could barely even tell myself, I kept trying to pretend it wasn't true..."

"Hannah..."

"I don't even want to tell you," Hannah practically whispers, a lump in her throat, "But that's the only way..."

Selina places an arm protectively around Hannah's shoulder, fingers brushing her satin jacket, remembering all the times Hannah's done the same for her. "Hannah," she says gently, trying to keep her voice steady. "I think I know what you mean."

There are glassy tears trickling from Hannah's eyes, sending messy streaks of black mascara down her face. "No. Selina, I like you. I like you more than I've ever liked any boy. I just care about you so much, and you're not just a friend. Not to me."

Selina swears her heart stops in that moment. Her breath catches in her throat at Hannah's words, and the panicked stare in her friend's - best friend's - eyes.

"I'm so sorry, Wolfie," she says hoarsely in a voice that's heartbroken, anxious, and tugs at Selina's heartstrings. "I know you like guys, I know this ruins everything, but I had to tell you... I'm sorry."

The joy buzzing in her head, the warmth in her heart, drowns out Hannah's words and Selina hears none of it. Hannah's ruined makeup and look of anguish don't make her any less beautiful, and Selina needs to _tell_ her that, make sure she knows it...

"This ruins nothing," Selina says, unable to stop the huge smile which spreads across her face. Why would she want to? She's alive in this moment. The pain on Hannah's face fades just a little, and she looks more curious, confused.  
    
"Wolfbloods," Selina says slowly, "Are far too civilised to let a thing like gender stop them falling for someone."

"You're saying wolfbloods," Hannah replies, looking like she can't believe her ears, "are all..."

"Most of us like a bit of everything," Selina grins. "Which, Hannah, is a very roundabout way of saying _I like you too_."

Hannah is visibly taken aback, shocked - she wipes some of the tears and mascara from her face and leans back, surprised. "You're serious, Wolfie? You're not just messing with me?"

"I wouldn't dream of it." Selina slips her long fingers into Hannah's and their hands intertwine, which feels natural and practically perfect. "But you have no idea how long I've dreamed of this."

Hannah laughs her wonderful laugh at that, and it lights up her whole face, heals Selina's lovesick mind, makes Selina wonder why she was ever scared or unsure.

"Then what are we waiting for?"

"I'm sorry?"

Nothing could have prepared Selina for kissing Hannah.

It is, of course, absolutely brilliant. Hannah's a good kisser, that's certain, and Selina's heart is bursting with happiness and she can't help but still be a little disbelieving. Because it feels like a dream, a fantasy, trapped in the pining thoughts she tried to repress - but it is all so, so real, and feels like the best present Selina's ever received.

When they break apart, Selina gasps for breath and that makes Hannah giggle again, a smirk on her face because she knows she's done a good job, and, Selina thinks happily, because she's got what she wanted. What they both wanted, this whole time - Selina stares at the smiling face of the girl who was once her enemy and then her friend and is now something more, and thanks herself for believing in the foolish side of her brain.

"That was awesome, Wolfie."

"It was?"

"Yeah. Do you think we should do it again?"

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you enjoyed! If you did read this, feel free to leave kudos and comments! - MJ


End file.
